Bumpy Road to Happiness

Posted on December 14, 2011 in Fun, Goals, Happiness by Sandra Bienkowski

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Are you happy? Do you have fun? If you answered “no” to either question, I’d like to help you ditch the drudgery and find joy. I am passionate about helping other people live happier, more fulfilling lives. I know what it’s like to be in the depths of depression (a story for another blog), but I dug my way out. Now I hope to inspire others with what I know.

I want my blog, Journey to Joy, to offer straight talk, real solutions that work, and the truth. First, a bit about my journey …

Several years ago, the quote, “the road to success is always under construction” certainly applied to me. Everything was going wrong. (Not the depression I spoke of earlier, just a bad patch) It was almost comical; at least that’s how I like to think of it now. My car went from reliable to lemon. I couldn’t get my car to shut off. Seriously. I felt like I was stuck in some sort of horror movie where my car was out to get me. Costly repairs made my paycheck disappear in a not-so-magical way. I also realized (after way too much time) that I was dating another narcissist. Maybe not by clinical definition, but let’s just say I should have bought these men mirrors instead of dating them … but I digress.

My friends were getting laid off in droves at the publishing company where I worked. While my job was safe, it was like going to work at a ghost town. It was no longer a fun, fulfilling place of employment. Feeling overwhelmed, I quickly turned into one of those people so consumed with my own problems, I became a crappy, self-absorbed friend. I lost some friendships in the process. I was in my 30s and life wasn’t turning out like I planned.

I pulled out my journal because writing always centers me. I wrote out a vision of how I wanted my life to look. And then I wrote out the depressing part—how my life currently looked. I asked myself: What steps do you need to take to turn your life into your ideal vision instead of its current mess? The action steps included things like: dump the lemon car and boyfriend, find a new job I love, and be a better friend. I was amazed at how quickly my life turned around. I landed a job at SUCCESS, a national magazine, writing about how people can improve their lives. (Fitting, right?) I took a time out from dating. I stopped talking about my own problems long enough to be a good friend again.

When you get clear on your problems and clear on where you are going, you can improve your life—fast.

If you don’t like where your life is today, write out a plan for your ideal life. What’s your ideal vision for your life? Write it down. Now write a description of how your life currently looks and compare it to your ideal vision. Don’t forget the most important part—the action steps that will lead you to your ideal life. List them for every change you need to make.

A quote from Katori Hall, a playwright featured in O magazine sums up this blog best. “It was like God was holding a bag of blessings and I was holding a bag of shit, and when I let go of my bag, God was like, ‘here you go.’”

So let go of the crap and let your blessings begin.

Sandra Bienkowski

A few words about me
Sandra Bienkowski

Sandra Bienkowski is a nationally published writer and a fun enthusiast, believing every minute of every day is an opportunity to live your best life.

 
21 Comments for this entry
Kaarina Dillabough
December 15, 2011
12:29

I am happy and I have fun! Love your post, your new site and your great attitude! Love the final line: ‘let go of the crap and let the blessings begin’. Amen to that! Cheers! Kaarina

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Kaedon
December 18, 2011
11:48

Impressive brain power at work! Great asnewr!

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Lidia
December 18, 2011
15:10

Stay with this guys, you’re heplnig a lot of people.

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Kim Thompson
December 19, 2011
17:15

I love your enthusiasm and wonderful advice… I’ll take it! With 2012 just around the corner, I will begin planning NOW! I will think outside of the box and I will measure my successes with a sense of pride!!! Kudos for a wonderful, inspirational article. Wishing you the best New Year ever!!! ~ Kim in Texas

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Mattress Reviews
December 20, 2011
08:43

Glad to read this blog! Keep it going!

Reply
Doris
December 23, 2011
02:54

great issues altogether, you just received brand new reader. What could you recommend in regards to your post that you just made some days in the past? Any positive?
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Sandra Bienkowski
December 29, 2011
08:41

Doris – Not sure of your question, but I’d love to provide you with an answer … Can you clarify? Thank you for taking the time to comment!

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Cholesterol diet
December 26, 2011
01:25

Very informative post. Thanks for taking the time to share your view with us.

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Winford
December 30, 2011
19:03

This is certainly some thing I must find more information about, thanks for the posting.

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Dave
December 30, 2011
22:13

Arrived at your blog post through Reddit. You know I am subscribing to your rss.

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Harmony
January 5, 2012
17:14

This is something I need to find more information about, appreciation for the blog post.

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Billi
January 5, 2012
17:35

It is usually rare to find informed persons on this issue, you seem like you understand exactly what you are dealing with! Cheers

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Cleo Eschrich
January 8, 2012
12:41

Whats up there admin, I just needed to make a quick remark to state that in fact I admired your specific posting. Thanks!

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Ellis Sanches
January 8, 2012
13:00

I conceive this website contains some real good information for everyone. “The individual will always be a minority. If a man is in a minority of one, we lock him up.” by Oliver Wendell Holmes.

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Nancy Kleinknecht
January 8, 2012
13:01

Very interesting details you have mentioned, regards for posting.

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Silicon Valley Real Estate
January 10, 2012
06:34

Hmm it looks like your website ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I wrote and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog. I too am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to everything. Do you have any recommendations for rookie blog writers? I’d definitely appreciate it.

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Sandra Bienkowski
January 10, 2012
06:43

Sure! The first thing you should do is determine your niche. What topic do you want to write about? You can write under several topics, but it helps position you as an expert if you have a specific focus. For example, my overall focus is life fulfillment. Also, if you want to read more tips, check out SocialMediaExaminer.com. It’s a great resource! Hope this info helps!

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tone
January 11, 2012
20:47

I think other web site owners should take this web site as an model – very clean and excellent style and design, in addition to the content. You’re an expert in this area!

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Julia F Rhynes
January 11, 2012
23:23

Great post I have been reading all your posts and they are really great keep up the good work.

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Sarah Glaspole
January 14, 2012
13:39

Lots of useful information here, makes you think of what really matters, this post will definatly help with my descision.

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Duncan Sinclair
January 14, 2012
13:53

You can certainly see your skills in the work you write. The world hopes for more passionate writers like you who are not afraid to say how they believe. Always go after your heart.

Reply

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